The whole "ess" thing truly used to be a legit thing. Calling women "something-ess" was a way to demean them, back in the day. It has much less significance now. Once things are gathered into the Universal Politically Corrected Code, everyone uses them and says, "see how progressive we all are now? We don't use those bad words, and so, there is no discrimination anymore."
Of course, this is a crock, there still is the discrimination, but it's beyond the realm of a word or label, so that using the correct term is meaningless. So, yes, you are correct, using the word "hostess" doesn't mean you are/aren't feminist, per se. It just means you don't buy into the lie that using the right "words" solves any slight. Having said that, I think you should try to call people what they prefer, if possible.
I also never saw it as demeaning for a man to open a door for a woman. As long as I can open a door for a man without him going gonzo... It's just being considerate, for crying out loud.
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Date: 2008-06-24 01:41 pm (UTC)Of course, this is a crock, there still is the discrimination, but it's beyond the realm of a word or label, so that using the correct term is meaningless. So, yes, you are correct, using the word "hostess" doesn't mean you are/aren't feminist, per se. It just means you don't buy into the lie that using the right "words" solves any slight. Having said that, I think you should try to call people what they prefer, if possible.
I also never saw it as demeaning for a man to open a door for a woman. As long as I can open a door for a man without him going gonzo... It's just being considerate, for crying out loud.